When I first got pregnant, I was flooded with information of all sorts from all kinds of resources: parents, grandparents, parents in law, friends, bloggers, friends of friends, mum classes, Lamaze instructors and parenting experts who were more or less present on social media. Each mother faces the same struggle, how do I know what is true, what is not true, what goes with the flow and what is actually harmful for a young baby?

I remember a friend once told me that when he was little, his parents used to put him in his little basket, on the stove, on the part of the stove that was not heated by the fire inside, to make sure he would never get cold! Me and him both grew up in Romania in the 90s, this story probably makes more sense with this little detail added. Now, in 2022, any attempt of even trying to put a child so close to the actual source of heat will stir adamant debates, eventually ending with a simple google search regarding what is the Sudden Infant Death Syndrome, what causes it and how can it be prevented.

During holiday times especially, when people tend to be more active on social media, exchange gifts or try to sell more objects parents actually don t need, you can notice lots of pictures showing unsafe sleep practices and very crowded baby rooms. Although they look great online, they bring no benefit to the child and more often than not, they create dangerous situations that sometimes lead to suffocation.

Although a child can and sometimes even will, sleep in baby carriers, swings, bounce chairs, car seats, pushchairs or side bed co-sleepers, the safest option for prolonged sleep is without question, on his back in his own bed. Remember this as the ABC rule: Alone, on his Back, in his Crib!

There are no exhaustive lists, you need to consider the particularities of your own sleeping choices, but the following are very common and sometimes unknown hazards:

• ‍^‍Up to 1 year of age, the child’s bed should have nothing else but a firm mattress, covered in a well fitted sheet.
• The bed should have no bumpers, no toys, or any other objects supposed to soothe the baby to or during sleep
  
• Young children do not need pillows or blankets and the safest option is a light tog sleeping bag.
• Baby nests, pods or cocoons look cute and sweet but they are extremely unsafe! They should only be used when the baby is awake and needs a safe space to be placed in shortly and under supervision.

Once the child is over 3 years of age and will be transitioned to a “big kid’s bed”, parents need to take into consideration a totally new and different set of official guidelines and I will write about this with a future occasion. It might sound like I am that rebel teenager who would say anything just to contradict and annoy his parents but this is actually true and it can save your child s life. Let s take each issue individually and sort out why sometimes unpopular opinions like this one actually hit deeper than it seems. You can find many companies or parenting influencers who make more than just a decent living out of selling baby goods so advising parents to keep the environment simple and buy less rather than more, has more consequences that originally thought for multiple reasons.

Oh, the baby bumpers!

This topic actually makes my heart pressure go crazy as although I do what I do, I still get friendly hints from family and friends that maybe, a simple bed is boring and also dangerous for a child who will sometimes walk or crawl around before going asleep. Oh! Don t get me started or I will hardly stop listing all the reasons why bumpers should not be used, sold or advertised.

The New York state has officially banned the selling of crib bumper pads and the use of such pads in certain settings already in 2019. I am sure you know what a crib bumper is, it is almost impossible not to observe it in each baby nursery you see on Facebook or Instagram. It is a non-mesh material resting directly above the mattress in a crib.

The law from the New York state also does not allow the child care facility or place of public accommodation to use or have on the premises any crib bumper pads, unless a medical professional determined the use of crib bumper pads is medically necessary. By place of public accommodation they mean any inn, hotel, motel or other establishment that provides lodging to guests.

There were many incident reports showing that children were subjected to suffocation and entrapment. Toddlers may misuse bumper pads to assist climbing out of the crib, leading to falls and injury. According to the Consumer Product Safety Commission, the risk of injury or death from such products may far outweigh the benefits.

Ohio, Maryland, and the city of Chicago already implemented similar bans. This is how important it is and this is what you should keep in mind next time your well intended friends will say “but what if the child will fall in the bed and hurt his or her head”? Rest assured nothing serious, if anything at all, will happen! Try picturing what suffocation looks like and the choice between buying or not buying a cot bumper will become obvious.

Cutesy wootsy toys in the crib

This one is easier though, most Pediatric Associations and maternity leaflets are on the same page, advising parents to keep the cot free of any toys or blankets until the child turns 1. To be on the safe side, it is advised not to leave anything in the crib during night or day sleep except for a pacifier if you use one and regularly check on that one as well, to make sure there are no spare or loose parts.

What about the cot mobiles though? Have you thought about the pros and cons of using a cot mobile to soothe your child at night? There are two contradictory opinions regarding this:

1. Fans of crib mobiles argue that they entertain babies when they wake in the night so that they are willing to wait for you more patiently if it takes you a little longer to get to them.
2. Those who argue against the mobiles, warn that it can transform babies’ associations with their cribs from places to sleep to places to play, making it harder for them to fall asleep.

If you do choose a mobile and plan to use it during the night, make sure it is securely attached to the crib or ceiling so it won’t fall down over the baby, and all of the hanging pieces are securely fastened. Pay close attention that your baby does not like his mobile so much that he or she will not to want to fall asleep and prefer to admire it. The moment you notice the child acquiring new moving skills, go ahead and remove the mobile from the cot.

Pillows and blankets

When it comes to pillows and blankets I advise you to wait as much as possible and even more important read the instructions that come with the products. Although it seems obvious what a blanket or a pillow does, when you actually stop and read their “boring” details usually nobody cares about, you will see they usually go along these lines:

“The Consumer Product Safety Commission recommends waiting to introduce pillows to your little one's sleep routine until they reach 18 months “.

This recommendation is based on what experts know about sudden infant death syndrome (SIDS) and its cousin, sudden unexplained death in childhood (SUDC). Without insisting too much on this aspect, remember the most important rule when it comes to decorating a child s room or bed, less is better and safer.

Ideally, in the first year, according to room temperature and season, you should choose light clothes and a light sleeping bag, rather than duvets and other cute materials with clouds and elephants. Children can pull them over their face and forget or not be able to take them back and this is how disasters happen.

Baby nests, pods or cocoons

This is a hot topic again. I received 2 when my baby was born and I sent both of them back with “compliments” to the persons who sent them to us. I am always considered as the “non fun” parent who always brings up the dark side of the things, where there are no cookies! I do not think children look cute in those soft cushioned pieces and they were very likely invented as another useless way to bring more income to the producer as they can hardly be considered a safe and useful product.

Most official and trustworthy sources warn against them, again as they pose a huge risk for SIDS and I think Lullaby Trust puts everything in words better than I ever could.

At one later occasion in the nearby future, I will come back with an article about the “breathing monitors known to reduce the risk of SIDS”. For now, I will just say that the American Academy of Pediatrics has reviewed the research on apnoea monitors and found no evidence that they impact the prevention of SIDS in healthy babies. As mentioned, another thing you do not need to buy!

If you are ever not sure about one product or a certain situation being unsafe, research properly using only official and trustworthy sources. You don t even need to believe what I write. After all, it is yet another blog online. If you make sure you follow the official guidelines the American Academy of Pediatrics or the National Health System of the United Kingdom are issuing (this is not an exhaustive list but these are 2 sources I respect and trust deeply) and advertising, you will sleep better at night knowing your child has everything he needs but still nothing that he could as well sleep peacefully without.

If there is something you will take with you from my post today, please take this: Always place your baby to sleep on his back and keep everything simple, not everything on the internet is safe and there are no magic "sleep solutions" you can purchase!